how to use a shepherds whistle

I was searching for just such a thing and came across this and it amused me so much I had to share it.


HOW TO USE A SHEPHERD'S WHISTLE

I am a firm believer in putting the cart before the horse. I name puppies before they're conceived. I
train dogs to release on command before the dog has anything to be released from. And I'm learning to
use a shepherd's whistle before I step into the arena with my dog.

I'm well acquainted with handling dogs with whistles. With hunting dogs, we use good old Acme
Thunderer whistles. They're loud enough to scare away innocent bystanders for miles. You can't vary
the tone much with the Thunderers, so it's all in the whistle pattern. For example, with my Brittany a
short, sharp "PWEET!" means "get going." A quick "PWEET-PWEET!" means "Look back at me--I want
you to cast in a different direction." A long, steady "PWEEEEEEET!" means "Come back, we're packing it
in. Don't you ignore me! I KNOW you're not deaf--come back here!! HEY!"

But with a shepherd whistle, tone is everything. For example, "puh-WHEEE" means "Away." "Toot, toot,"
means "walk up." "Schlurrrgh" means "My whistle is full of spit."

For my fellow beginners, here's how to use a shepherd's whistle:
1) Place whistle in mouth and clench it between your teeth. Blow.
2) Take out the whistle and look at it really, really hard. Repeat step (1).
3) Pick whistle off ground. Place lanyard around neck and repeat step (1).
4) Rinse off whistle. Repeat step (1)
5) Get in car and drive far away from angry family.
6) Repeat step (1)
7) Wipe spit off steering wheel. Repeat step (1)
Look around triumphantly when you produce an ear-piercing "screeeeeeet"
9) Shout (in a fake Scottish accent), "Lie dooon! Lie dooon, dammya!"

Congratulations! You are now ready to compete in money trials at the Novice level.

By Judy Menown

Hoorrah!

Yesterday Dave (who seemed more active - take that as you will), and I went on a jolly shopping exhibition to Northallington.
On the list where lubes for kermit, a couple of plant sprayers...

(pause - fook me! Dave's just asked me if I want a brew "just looking after your needs")

Any way, found a lube shop and got some more bits for Olive too. Then we went on a explore of a farm suppliers - fook me was that an Alladins cave - came away with amongst other things a shepherds whistle.

In the garden centre we eventually tracked down a plant sprayer with hose an nossel. The annoying thing about this is I have 2 at home just for this purpose. One is for EP90 and the other ATF. Makes refilling those arkward parts, gearbox, axles etc, so much easier. And 2 because it is not recommended that you contaminate one sort of lubricant with another.

So a complete fluid change may happen on Kermit today - hopefully James will come over and give me a hand while Dave potters about on the farm.

Hoorrah!
Dave and I have been planning a bit of Cray fish trapping over the last few days, and on our shopping jolly yesterday we aquired all the bits we thought we'd need to make a Cray fish trap, like a lobster pot but longer.

Anyway, after much trimming and folding of garden netting and mmuch use of the savour of the world ie cable ties, we finally had what we thought would make a great cray fish pot. ]

With the addition of a modified sugar shaker as a bait holder we set of down to the beck at about 10 last night. With both of wearing head lights we must of looked like a right couple of porchers - a worry for Dave apparently.

This morning: Beutiful sunny day - best yet infact, Dave and I set of to take the dogs, Max and Buffy, for a walk and to see if we'd actually been successful.

Hoorrah! upon sliding down the bank of the river and trawling in our Cray Contraption we thought at first we'd not actually got anything but on further inspection, sitting there under one of the funnel ends was a small cray fish - it works, and buggar! I'd not got my camera with me, pictures will follow however.

No picture - it never happened, my motto

Week 2 Upt North

We've been at Daves now since last Tuesday (it's now Saturday) and not a lot has happened.

Max had his bandages taken off on Thursday, "he's made a good job of that" said the vet, talking more aboutt Max I think that the work of the previous vet. Max now has a protuding toe that in certain situations looks like he's giving you the finger.

We can't start work on Olive (re-wiring) untill Kermit is road legal - no MOT, booked in for Tuesday. Should be OK as he's not done a great deal since the last MOT.

James popped over yesterday and we all had a trip out to a Ex military LR dealer, only James walked away without spending anything - how do you do that?

Dave got some bits required for the rewire job and I bought a heavey duty isolation switch and a box spanner for the hub nut - had one and it went missing, soooooo annoying when that happens.

Still very bleak here in the north (east). It's been both windy and wet.

I now know just how hard Dave works on the farm, and that is as much as I'm going to say

Not sure what we're doing today, I'm just about to have a brew and make a list and it must include oil change for Kermit, and buy some pegs for Dave - long story

Right, time to see if I can get Dave motivated... this may take awhile.

All Change

Thursday:
I was on the phone to TERRY (NortherN) with regard to my delema about getting myself, Max, and Kermit up north. After a bit of hummin’ an’ arring he said he and Cindy could come down on Friday night after work, elation and panic set in. Good I was finally going to be heading up north, panic, am I ready, or more importantly is Kermit ready?

Good boys – Bad girls

Well!
It’s 7 days since we set off for Up North and it’s been both traumatic and boring.
Firstly it took us nearly nine hours to do the journey up from Havant via Brunel, Uxbridge, and several service stations along the way, comfort/dog walk breaks.

Many thanks have to go to Terry (Northern) and Cindy for trekking all the way down in the first place. ‘Twas a rescue mission in itself.

Since our arrival nothing much has actually happened, and this is mostly thanks to the adventures of Max. Well ya see, I was so looking forward to this being his big holiday adventure. He’d meet his cousins, cows, horses, and water – what a playground I thought.

First day: Sheena, 14 years old, lives at home. When I say home I actually mean the 3 foot between the kitchen and the living room, in the actual door way in fact. Sheena is old, grumpy and unsociable, to the point she growls as soon as you look at here (if you’re a dog that is). Needless to say Max had much trouble moving from one room to another, in fact he didn’t, he’s a quick learner and one growl is enough to let him know you aint to be messed wiv.

The pen:
Dogs, more of, horses, cows, and more smells than ya could wave a stick at, them too, sticks.

Lucka, big Alsatian bitch, big but very playful once she’s had her bark of the “hello, who the fuck are you? Get off my land.” Chorus.

Sadey. Huskey type thing, mixed breed, small, also bitch. Playful as anything, nice smile, and on heat. Fanny waving all over the place.

So on his first trip to the pen Max has the grumpy ol’ bird, the huge playful but clumsy Alsatian, and the more my size playful but what’s that interesting smell, to deal with. All this and the horses that can be playful, and, what are those small cows doing here?

It didn’t last long. Sheena “stay well away whoever ya are” – and he did. Lucka “come play with me.” And he did ‘til she clobbered him one and he being a quick learner decided she was far to rough. This surprised me however considering the many hours he’s played rough with Noodles down at Marks workshop. Ha, but then again, Noodles is a boy dog!

And Sadey. Just stay well away from her Max. She’s to young and your showing a more than usual interest in heterosexual activities.

So after most of the introductions were over we went for a short walk up to the reservoir and a swim.

The next day we took Max and grumpy Sheena up to the pen. Locked Sadie in the barn for a bit so that Max could have an explore. Mum pottered about and I painted a couple of stables with wood preservative. Before leaving we took the dogs for a walk and a swim. On locking up Max wandered in to the river opposite the gate. When I called him he got excited and run down the river, departing with a paw held in the air and dripping with blood. There and then it didn’t look to bad, so we decided to get him home and have a closer look at it. He jumped in to the back of the Land Rover and we set off.

By the time we got home, only a five minute journey at maximum, the back of Kermit was cover in blood. Max jumped out but by the time he’d got to the back door we realised it was bleeding badly and so wrapped his paw tightly in a towel and drove him over to the vets in Colne.

The vet took him away while mum and I waited. The vet eventually returned to say he’d cut in between 2 toes quite badly and they’d like to sedate him which would mean an over night stay.

Next morning - £240 later, Max is bandaged up and just as bouncy as ever. Today is Monday and this morning he seemed to be more lame than at any time since it happened, he was due to return to the vets tomorrow for a check up and dressing change but we decided to see if we could get him in today. Another £48 later, and he seems happier. Plenty of rest needed, like he’ll like that, and hopefully bandages off on Thursday, to get some fresh air to it.

Dogs have quite webbed toes and what he to appears to have done is cut down between 2 of them and underneath one of them, cutting a tendon, which means in future that toe may protrude slightly and require the nail clipping as it wont sit on the deck properly.

We haven’t had a chance to see Terry and Cindy all week. Spoke to Dave (farmer) yesterday, he may well be coming over tomorrow to pick us up and take us back over to his for a few days.

Except for the very first day when we painted the stables it’s rained everyday since, and heavily. Very grim up north.

Losing weight and other myths...

Graham popped over yesterday with the new improved vice mount - pounds lighter. I however was out, again, this time with Ian down at Trisha’s burger van. I managed to relay this information to Graham when he called just before total signal loss. Graham and Nay joined us down there. It was a scorcher of a day and G made the mistake of sitting facing the sun, could be good except when your sat at an aluminium table, poor sod was blinded.

When I got home there it was, vice holder Mkii, trimmed and shaved and pounds lighter - much better. Also the NATO hitch has had its bolts trimmed and now fitted on to the slider plate. Two of the bolts where to long and could not be tightened up with the pin in place. All in all two nice bits of kit.



Since not going to Brunel (last Wednesday I just had to call it a day) I’ve felt so much better. More quality sleep, relaxed day times sorting a few things out, learning more about final cut pro, and cycling!

Yes cycling. I got my bike out again and for the last 3 evenings Max and I have been getting some proper exercise. The only pitfalls I’ve discovered so far are A, watch out for Max coming up behind you with a new found stick, stick come tree, B he still has the occasional problem with lane discipline and can cut you up - not nice on rough terrain at speed. So far I’ve clocked him keeping up at 16.5 mph. We both seem to be benefiting from the exercise and I just hope the weather holds out a bit longer.

The only real down side to cycling, for me, and it always has been, is that after a few minutes at the start of a journey the tendons around my knees hurt like hell - all ways have done. Some one told me years ago that it’s a simple operation to get them fixed. If I do, and I hope I do, keep up the cycling then I’m going to have to seriously think about having it done. Sometimes I think “can I be bothered to go through that pain barrier today” and it would be a shame if it were to put me off.

One other thing that I think is contributing to me feeling better/healthier is the fact that I’m now in a position to eat much healthier again - yummy.

For Sale

Ian and Debs have finally got their Tomb Raider on the market. I hope for them it sells soon, that’d be a weight of their minds. I still think they should push it more on the forums rather than relying on just Autotrader but hey ho.

September already - but at least summer has arrived

For someone who never goes anywhere it’s been quite an eventful week - on a “I live a sad life” scale any ways.

A couple of weeks ago (the Sloe weekend in fact) I eventually managed to retrieve the NATO hitch from Marks workshop that’s had my name on for at least eight months - we get distracted and forget things see.

A few days later Ian as in “Ian n Debs” from round the corner (Camel 110 P253 KAC - and the minders of ‘Jason’ (Camel Disco P251 KAC), any ways, Ian came round for the evening and some actual socialising went on, rather nice it was too, to actually spend an evening chatting rather than 2 hours in front of a film to then only say “good night”.

Twas during this time Ian let slip he was to be working nights next week, and we knows how bored Ian gets on nights, so I asked him if he could take aforementioned NATO hitch to work and give it a good ol’ blast. I’d tried that day to take it apart but it was well “glued’ up in years worth of muck and layer upon layer of paint.

Well! Only the very next day does he turn up, and was I well chuffed or what...


Not only had he blasted it - had it taken apart and greased, reassembled, he's also painted it. It looked the dogs. That’s 2 lumps of iron I was drooling over in almost as many days.

As a beside, Ian mentioned that he never knew that Dixon Bate's made the NATO Hitch - well we all live and learn, especially as I've just had to nick some code from Dan n Jens blog :o)

Earlier in the week Graham had dropped of his take on the Vice Holder. At LRW earlier this year I saw and purchased a vice holder. I knew straight off it was made of chocolate but wanted it to pass on to “them that knows” to see if they could make a over engineered, fit for a Land Rover, replacement, using the chocolate once as a model and template for holes required etc.

Yes, so. Graham turned up with half a blacksmiths yard in the back of his bag (he’s another one with access to a work shop... and works nights!) - I wasn’t in at the time he arrived as Max decided his needs were more important, however upon our return there was this... what I can only describe as a lump sitting on the door step, that and a packet of Worthers but that’s another story.

This G version Mk i as it will be known, as James has the original chocolate one up north and his blacksmith friend has made 3 versions Mk i, ii, and iii being the latest. G Mk i really is a lump, and he’d gone and painted it bright red. Believe me 10mm steel weighs a lot more than chocolate.

It took me a few days to offer the said lump up to it mounting plate and vice - in fact it was the day after Ian had delivered the hitch, and he was back for coffee.

I assembled all the bits, vice holder to slider plate, vice to vice holder (funny how that works!) - and admired - even took some photographs I was so chuffed.


After mounting the whole ensemble on to the truck I was very conscious of the weight - and began to look at ways we could loose a few pounds, after all this thing was so over engineered the must be some bits we could chop.

After trying various settings, vice open wide, slider plate fully raised, 2-3 inch could be lost, that’s still 2-3 pounds in weight I think. I text Graham “Remind me, 14mm. X”, a couple of the holes needed meatier bolts.

Graham arrived Friday tea time, 5 packs of Worthers this time (don’t ask), and we proceed to diagnose the vice holder and all the fitting and using implications. 1 hour later he leaves, with: original vice holder, NATO hitch, slider plate and pin, full set of bolts - he’s on his motor bike for fooks sake. This lot weighs nearly as much!



Friday:

JU phones, “I’m in the area - are you at home?”
Reply “Yes.”
“Where’s that these days?”
“Havant.”
“OK - I’m not in the area.”

After a small discussion as to the near distance of Havant to his current whereabouts he agrees to come over. Kettles on.

We chat, show each other videos... I’m so not going to acknowledge any smutty thoughts or innuendos at this point - needless to say you’d have to have been there to appreciate them - work on that as much as you like ;o)

We part a good few hours later on the understanding that Jon will pop round tomorrow and take me (go on - think it) - to his place and let me have a go with his equipment - of the welding variety!

mf