how to use a shepherds whistle

I was searching for just such a thing and came across this and it amused me so much I had to share it.


HOW TO USE A SHEPHERD'S WHISTLE

I am a firm believer in putting the cart before the horse. I name puppies before they're conceived. I
train dogs to release on command before the dog has anything to be released from. And I'm learning to
use a shepherd's whistle before I step into the arena with my dog.

I'm well acquainted with handling dogs with whistles. With hunting dogs, we use good old Acme
Thunderer whistles. They're loud enough to scare away innocent bystanders for miles. You can't vary
the tone much with the Thunderers, so it's all in the whistle pattern. For example, with my Brittany a
short, sharp "PWEET!" means "get going." A quick "PWEET-PWEET!" means "Look back at me--I want
you to cast in a different direction." A long, steady "PWEEEEEEET!" means "Come back, we're packing it
in. Don't you ignore me! I KNOW you're not deaf--come back here!! HEY!"

But with a shepherd whistle, tone is everything. For example, "puh-WHEEE" means "Away." "Toot, toot,"
means "walk up." "Schlurrrgh" means "My whistle is full of spit."

For my fellow beginners, here's how to use a shepherd's whistle:
1) Place whistle in mouth and clench it between your teeth. Blow.
2) Take out the whistle and look at it really, really hard. Repeat step (1).
3) Pick whistle off ground. Place lanyard around neck and repeat step (1).
4) Rinse off whistle. Repeat step (1)
5) Get in car and drive far away from angry family.
6) Repeat step (1)
7) Wipe spit off steering wheel. Repeat step (1)
Look around triumphantly when you produce an ear-piercing "screeeeeeet"
9) Shout (in a fake Scottish accent), "Lie dooon! Lie dooon, dammya!"

Congratulations! You are now ready to compete in money trials at the Novice level.

By Judy Menown

Hoorrah!

Yesterday Dave (who seemed more active - take that as you will), and I went on a jolly shopping exhibition to Northallington.
On the list where lubes for kermit, a couple of plant sprayers...

(pause - fook me! Dave's just asked me if I want a brew "just looking after your needs")

Any way, found a lube shop and got some more bits for Olive too. Then we went on a explore of a farm suppliers - fook me was that an Alladins cave - came away with amongst other things a shepherds whistle.

In the garden centre we eventually tracked down a plant sprayer with hose an nossel. The annoying thing about this is I have 2 at home just for this purpose. One is for EP90 and the other ATF. Makes refilling those arkward parts, gearbox, axles etc, so much easier. And 2 because it is not recommended that you contaminate one sort of lubricant with another.

So a complete fluid change may happen on Kermit today - hopefully James will come over and give me a hand while Dave potters about on the farm.

Hoorrah!
Dave and I have been planning a bit of Cray fish trapping over the last few days, and on our shopping jolly yesterday we aquired all the bits we thought we'd need to make a Cray fish trap, like a lobster pot but longer.

Anyway, after much trimming and folding of garden netting and mmuch use of the savour of the world ie cable ties, we finally had what we thought would make a great cray fish pot. ]

With the addition of a modified sugar shaker as a bait holder we set of down to the beck at about 10 last night. With both of wearing head lights we must of looked like a right couple of porchers - a worry for Dave apparently.

This morning: Beutiful sunny day - best yet infact, Dave and I set of to take the dogs, Max and Buffy, for a walk and to see if we'd actually been successful.

Hoorrah! upon sliding down the bank of the river and trawling in our Cray Contraption we thought at first we'd not actually got anything but on further inspection, sitting there under one of the funnel ends was a small cray fish - it works, and buggar! I'd not got my camera with me, pictures will follow however.

No picture - it never happened, my motto

Week 2 Upt North

We've been at Daves now since last Tuesday (it's now Saturday) and not a lot has happened.

Max had his bandages taken off on Thursday, "he's made a good job of that" said the vet, talking more aboutt Max I think that the work of the previous vet. Max now has a protuding toe that in certain situations looks like he's giving you the finger.

We can't start work on Olive (re-wiring) untill Kermit is road legal - no MOT, booked in for Tuesday. Should be OK as he's not done a great deal since the last MOT.

James popped over yesterday and we all had a trip out to a Ex military LR dealer, only James walked away without spending anything - how do you do that?

Dave got some bits required for the rewire job and I bought a heavey duty isolation switch and a box spanner for the hub nut - had one and it went missing, soooooo annoying when that happens.

Still very bleak here in the north (east). It's been both windy and wet.

I now know just how hard Dave works on the farm, and that is as much as I'm going to say

Not sure what we're doing today, I'm just about to have a brew and make a list and it must include oil change for Kermit, and buy some pegs for Dave - long story

Right, time to see if I can get Dave motivated... this may take awhile.